There’s a popular book out there called “Getting to Why” and it is an amazing book about finding your life’s purpose. But if you’re looking to figure out life one day at a time when it blows up, it’s probably better to get to WHAT. If you’re trying to move yourself forward or trying to help a friend with a difficulty, never ask why.
Why did I do that? Why did my sister lie to me? Why did my partner cheat? Why am I feeling so tired? Why is life so hard? Why do bad things happen when I’m trying so hard to do good? Why am I not getting any customers? Why? Why? Why? These are questions without solid answers. We’ll never truly know another person’s deep down reasons for an action and we’ll end up with only murky philosophical bullshit when we question the Universe about things.
Here’s a better way: Ask “What?” What could I do differently? What can I do to be more successful (challenged, motivated, etc.)? What is going on in that person’s life that I can help with? What can I do to be a better spouse (or attract a better kind of partner)? What can I do right now to improve my health? What choices can I make that will improve my situation? What can I do differently to attract customers?
“What” is a question that will yield more useful answers. So next time you find yourself shouting WHY into the void, rephrase the questions to what questions and take action.